The Trouble In My Head
by Baxxie
Summary: The Taylor family has been through some tough times, since Randy lost his sight. When finally something good happens, will it last? Or is it a sign for something worse to come? Read and find out!
1. Prologue

Prologue

Hi, my name is Brad Taylor. I'm 16 years old and I just got my license. It's great, really. But don't expect me to jump up and down with excitement. The only way for you to get me to do that, is if you built me a time machine, so I could go back five years ago. If I could do that, I could fix everything. But you can't do that, can you?

I'm sorry. I shouldn't make you feel bad. It's not your fault, it's mine. I'm the only one to blame for all the things my family is going through right now. They may tell me that's not true, but I know they're just trying to spare my feelings.

And here I go again, making it all about me. It's not about me, my life is going great, which is exactly the problem!

Okay, maybe I should explain to you what happened first.

It all started five years ago, I was 11 and my borther Randy was 10. We were playing in the garage, even though dad always told us not to. That only made us want to do it more...

_Flashback_

_'Come on Brad, catch me if you can!' I run after my little brother, as he just laughs and runs towards the hotrod. He climbs onto the beams that would turn into the bottom half of the car. I stop running as he starts to balance on the beams._

_'Get away from there Randy, you're getting footprints all over the new hotrod.' He just rolled his eyes and walks on the beams, making sure to plant his entire foot on it. 'I'm warning you Randy!'_

_'What, you don't like this? Am I annoying you? Oh, look at me, I'm getting footprints on a big piece of junk.' He laughs as I try to grab him._

_'Come on, Randy. We've worked really hard on it, trying to make it look good. Just stop it!' He sticks out his tongue._

_'Catch me if you can Brad. I mean, I know you're not that smart, but you're taller than me. You should have caught me by now.' he laughs as I lunge at him again._

_'Okay, that's it! I'll get you.' His eyes widen in mock angst._

_'Oh, no. Someone help me, Brad is going to get me!' I glare at him and we both smirk at each other as we stand across from eachother. I lunge at him and he steps backwards. _

_Everything seems to go in slowmotion as his foot gets caught underneath one of the beams and he starts to fall backwards. I want to grab him, but I'm too late. My eyes widen in shock as I see my little brother falls backwards and lands his head hard on the workbench in the garage. Then he just lies still, eyes close._

_When I finally get my body to function again, I rush over to him and try to wake him._

_'Randy? Are you ok? Randy, can you hear me? I'm sorry. Please be ok!' I shake him frantically. I start to panic as he doesn't respond. I have to go get help! But who? Wilson, he'll be..._

_I feel anger rising as I see a smirk start to form on my brother's face. I hit him in the guts as he starts laughing and opens his eyes._

_'Oh man, you should have heard yourself. Randy, I'm sorry, please be ok! Priceless!' I glare at him and hit him again._

_'I can't believe you! I really thought you got hurt.' He still smiles, but it quickly fades as he realized I'm being serious._

_'Alright, I'm sorry. I was just having a little fun.' _

_'Well, don't. It wasn't funny.' I try to stay mad, but I can't help but smile myself. 'Man, your head must really be too big for your body. You smacked it pretty hard, and for it not to hurt like that, it must be full of air.' His eyes widen as I laugh and quickly get away from him as he starts to chase me into the kitchen, also still laughing._

As I think about this, I should have checked him and made sure he was alright. If I had looked closer, I would have seen the blood that had appeared on the workbench. If I had seen that, I could have warned someone, anything. It might have made a difference... But well, I guess it's too late for that. He seemed to be fine, but then again, he was always great at acting fine when he wasn't...

_A few hours after we're done playing, I am finishing up my homework, while he is playing some game on the computer in our room. I've noticed he hasn't said anything in a while. When I look over at him, I notice he seems a little out of it._

_'Randy? Are you ok?' He seems to snap out of it and looks at me confused._

_'Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine.'_

_'Are you sure? I mean, you did hit your head pretty hard on that workbench. Don't you have a headache?' he looks annoyed and goes back to play his game._

_'Yes, I'm fine, Brad.'_

_'Okay, whatever. I'm finished with my homework. You want to play a game together?' _

_'Nope.' He doesn't look up._

_'Ok. Well, I'm gonna go downstairs and see what's for dinner.' He doesn't respond. _

_As I walk downstairs I can hear my dad yelling at my mom._

_'Jill, how many times do I have to ask you not to touch anything when you're in the garage.'_

_'I didn't touch anything.'_

_'Oh, really? Then why is there red nailpolish on my workbench?' Red nailpolish? There wasn't any red nailpolish on the workbench when we were in there... Was there? I stay on the stairs and listen to the rest of the conversation._

_'Why would I paint my nails in the garage? I don't even have red nailpolish.' _

_'Really? Well, if it isn't nail polish, then what is it?' they go into the garage and I lean closer, so I can hear what they're saying._

_'Tim, this isn't nail polish. I think this is.. I think it's blood.' Oh, no..._

_'Blood? How did blood get on my workbench? Did you cut yourself or something?'_

_'I haven't been anywhere near the garage today. It must be from one of the boys. I'll go get them.' I try to make myself invisible as she comes towards the stairs._

_'Why would it be from one of the boys? They know not to go in there when I'm not here.'_

_'Tim, they're kids. Anything you say can. and will be used against you. Whatever you tell them not to do, they will do exactly that. Haven't you figured that out by now? Boys? Get down here, your father and I want to talk to you.' Oh, shit... what am I going to do? I can see my youngest brother Mark running past me, going downstairs._

_I take a deep breath and go downstairs. If I don't go, they'll suspect something._

_When we come down, mom and dad tell us to sit down. I can't help but notice Randy hasn't come down yet. Maybe he didn't hear her._

_'Brad? Where's Randy?' I give her the most innocent look I can._

_'I don't know, he must still be in our room. Maybe he didn't hear you.'_

_'Brad? Could you explain to me how blood got on my workbench?' I try to avoid looking at both of them, but that just gives me away._

_'Brad, what happened? Did you play with one of your dad's tools and cut yourself?' Think, think.._

_'Uhm, yeah, I cut myself. Yeah, that's it.'_

_'Really? Where, let me see it.'_

_'See what?'_

_'The cut. Let me see it.' I'm really starting to panic now._

_'Okay, fine, I didn't cut myself. It's Randy's blood.' Okay, didn't expect that to come out of my mouth. Mom looks shocked._

_'What do you mean? What happened?' Well, I better tell them now..._

_'Look, it's not a big deal. We were just playing in the garage and Randy climbed onto the hotrod. I tried to get him to come off, but he wouldn't listen. So, I climbed on it, too. I just wanted to get him to stop making the hotrod dirty. But when I tried to grab him, he fell backwards and hit his head on the workbench.'_

_My parents look at eachother with wide eyes._

_'Why didn't you say anything?' Mom rushes to the stairs._

_'Because he said he was fine. I didn't want us to get into trouble for playing in the garage. I never saw the blood, we just continued playing.'_

_Dad looks at me with an angry face. He wants to say something when mom yells for him from upstairs. She sounds upset._

_'Both of you, stay here. We'll talk about this later.' He runs after my mom. _

_Me and my brother sit downstairs in silence as we listen to my mom as she starts screaming my brother's name. My heart is pounding in my chest as we both wait to find out what's going on..._

Needless to say, it turns out Randy wasn't fine. Mom found him lying on the ground, unconscious, with a gaping wound at the back of his head. They called an ambulance, who arrived in about ten minutes and rushed him towards the hospital. Mom went with him, while we drove with my dad in silence.

After doing some tests on him, the doctors said it was just a concussion, he would be fine. We could go see him right away. I felt relieved. I think everyone did.

But the moment he opened his eyes, our lives changed. He couldn't see.

My parents were angry with the doctor. How could he say he was fine, when he couldn't see anything?

The doctor tried apologising, but it was too late...

At just 10 years old, my little brother had gone blind. And it was all my fault...

--

A/N Let me know what you think! Sorry about the long chapter, I didn't know where to stop :P

Please read and review! Love, Baxxie


	2. Chapter 1 Adjusting

Chapter 1 Adjusting...

Brad

_Detroit, 27th August 1996_

_Dear Journal,_

Randy has been blind for over five years now and I'm still not used to it.

Dad had the whole house adjusted to his needs after we found out. He put a railing on the walls and he voice-activated nearly every door in the house, including those of cabinets and the fridge. He actually made a Tool Time project out of it.

I don't understand how he could do something like that. It seemed like he benefited from Randy's blindness. He probably didn't mean it like that, but that's how it seems to me.

Our whole life has completely changed. Next to the house we basically adjusted our lives to his needs.

Not that I mind. After all, since I caused it, I don't mind doing something for him. I know I shouldn't think that, even Randy told me so, but I still feel responsible. I'm the older one, I should have paid attention.

We never really talked about the 'accident' since we found out. Mostly because I refused to.

It's so strange to see him like this. He's always been the smart one out of all of us. And now he can't even go to school. Yeah, he's being home schooled by Wilson right now, but it's not the same. He'll never go to college. It's just not fair!

Mom has become overbaring of him. I've noticed on more than one occasion that it pisses him off when she does things for him. He wants to do everything by himself. I always admired that in him. Whenever Mark, dad or me are in the room when mom tries to do something, we try to help out. I know he's usually grateful.

She just treats him like he's disabled and can't do anything. One time, he completely freaked out and yelled at her that he didn't need her help, he still had four other senses he could use.

Ofcourse she got mad at him. She couldn't understand how he could think so lightly of it.

I guess sometimes I wonder that myself. But then I shake that out and remind myself that just because he lost his vision, doesn't mean he's any different than anyone else. He just wants to be treated normal. He hates all the special treatment he gets from most of us. I usually try to keep that in mind when I'm in a room with him.

The thing I really don't get is his humour. Ofcourse he still makes jokes, that's just his nature. But he makes jokes about him being blind as well. It upsets most of us when he does. Dad usually joins in, but he only does it so Randy won't get upset. I guess it's just his way of dealing with it, so we don't say anything about it.

He insisted on keeping his bedroom in the basement, even though none of us thought it was a good idea. Mom especially wanted to keep him close to her, ofcourse. But maybe that's also the reason he wanted to stay in the basement, to get away from her.

That discussion took a while, but in the end they agreed he could stay down there. They did put in an intercom system that's voice-activated, he can use that if he needs anything.

Now, after five years Mark is moving in with him. He wasn't too happy about it, but uncle Marty and Aunt Nancy have gotten divorced and Uncle Marty needed a place to stay, so mom and dad offered him Mark's room.

I feel somehow a little jealous that he gets to spend more time with Randy now. We used to be so close years ago, but as we're getting older and I'm really starting my own life, we've been growing apart. Maybe I could stay down there with them for a sleepover sometime. Oh, that sounds so lame right now... But it could be fun, just the three of us, like we used to. No, wait, we never involved Mark in that. Well, I could always kick him out.

Oh, I'm late for school, I should get going. Catch ya later!

_Brad_

--

A/N Okay, I hope you guys like this chapter. I'm not gonna keep it in Brad's pov, others will come up. But I just want to let everyone know how they all deal with this. I hope I didn't offend anyone with this chapter in any way. If I did, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.

Well, let me know what you think! I'll probably speed up the story even more, just read the descrition of my story to find out the plot. Somethin good is going to happen soon and after that, I can really start the story. So, if these chapters are somewhat short or contain too much info, don't worry, it's not staying that way for long.

Please let me know what you think, thanks so much :)

Love, Baxxie


	3. Chapter 2 Understanding

Chapter 2 Understanding

Randy

The last five years have been very strange. It's weird to live my life without vision. I mean, I can manage fine, but it's just weird. It took a long time to get used to it.

I have to get by on my other senses, mainly my hearing. I recognise all the people in my life by their voices and sounds they make. Just like right now. I can hear Mark coming down the stairs. He's trying to be as quiet as possible, 'cause he thinks I'm asleep. But I can hear him, I always can.

He had band practice with some of his friends today. I guess he ran a little late, 'cause the clock just informed me it's already midnight. Now that is one of the weird parts. A clock that talks. But that's not nearly as strange as the fridge door and the kitchen cabinets talking... Now that I really had to get used to.

'Hey Mark!' I can hear him tripping and falling backwards, landing in a pile of his own clothes. Yeah, I live with a pig.

'Randy... You scared me. Don't do that! How did you know it was me, I thought you were sleeping?' I can hear him turning the lights on. After five years, everyone still leaves the lights off when they walk into my room at night. They don't want to wake me up, go figure...

'You woke me up actually. You know, you make a lot of noise.'

'Oh, I am so sorry, I tried to be as quiet as possible, I didn't mean to wake you up...' I start to smirk as I imagine the look on his face. 'Randy, that's not funny!' I start to laugh and after a few seconds he starts to laugh, too. Apparently my laugh is infectious.

'You should have seen the look on your face. I wish I could have!' I'm still laughing, but I can tell he's stopped. I can hear him getting into bed and turning the lights off. For a few minutes it's quiet as my laughing has ceased.

'Randy?'

'Hm?'

'How do you do it?'

'How do I do what?'

'This. I mean, you're blind. You have been for five years now and you don't seem affected by that at all. You haven't changed a bit. You still joke about everything, including being blind. Everyone in this house seems to be dealing with this a lot harder than you. How do you do that?' Wow, that definitely caught me off guard...

'You say it like you think I don't care, like it's easy or something.'

'Well, that's kinda how it seems.'

'It's not easy at all. You think it's easy for me to go through a day, knowing I'll probably never see again? That I'll never go to school again? Of course it isn't. But I try to live life to the fullest and you want to know why? Because if I don't, I will loose my mind. I make jokes to forget about everything and because it makes me feel normal. I don't mean to upset anyone by making jokes about being blind, but that's how I always deal with things, just like dad. You know, when someone dies, he starts to joke about it. That's his way of dealing with it and it's how I deal with my problems. I'm sorry, alright? But what would you rather have me do? You guys want me to act different? Lock myself up in my room and just hope for my sight to come back? Cry all day, because I'll never go to college? Well, I'm sorry, but I'm happy to be alive right now and I like my life the way it is, even if it is without any vision.' I try to say this as calmly as possible, even though some anger comes through. How can he think this is easy? How can any of them think that?

'You know, that is exactly why I envy you so much.' My heart is in my throat as I never heard Brad come in.

'Brad, when did you come in? I didn't even hear you.'

'You were so busy explaining yourself to Mark, I guess you weren't paying attention.'

'Yeah, I guess. But, wait, you envy me?' I can't help but smile at that and feel a little pride.

'Yeah, I envy you. Now don't let it go to your head. I just envy the way you deal with this. I mean, Mark is right. Everyone here is having a harder time dealing with this than you, or at least that's how it seems. Now don't take that the wrong way. I don't mean this is easier for us, I guess we just have a harder time hiding it and getting over it. I envy the way you don't let anything change your life, your happiness. Your still yourself and I'm happy about that.' I can hear Mark turning on the lamp on is nightstand.

'That goes for me too. You know, I really look up to you. I don't know what I would do if I was in your situation, but I wish that I could handle it like you. I mean, yeah, you can be obnoxious, especially when you and Brad gang up on me. But somehow I'm glad you still do. Don't take that as an invite, by the way. Just because I'm glad you still do, doesn't mean I like it.' Brad and me are both laughing now.

'Well, you are kind of asking for it. It's just too bad I can't see. I would love to have a pillow fight right now.' And it's quiet again. 'I um... it means a lot to hear you guys say that. I know it might seem easy for me, but it's not, trust me. I have plenty of moments where I do wanna lock myself into my room and never come out, I just try to hide it and ignore it.'

'You shouldn't do that. I mean, we're both here if you ever need to talk. You don't have to make jokes to cover up what you're really feeling. You shouldn't put those feelings away, you'll just build them up, until you blow up, like you did with mom.' I hear the smile in Brad's voice.

'Yeah, that wasn't pretty, was it?'

'No, not really. But I have to say, it was kind of awesome the way you stood up to her. I have always wanted to do that. I mean, she is always telling us what to do. It's so annoying.'

'Brad, she's your mother. It's her job to tell you what to do. If she doesn't, you'll just sit here and do nothing. No, wait, you still do that. Yeah, I agree, she shouldn't tell you what to do, what's the point? You'll end up working at Chucky Cheese anyway.' That gets Mark a pillow thrown at his head. It was a good shot, hearing his muffled laughing. I laugh, too, but I know he wouldn't dare throw a pillow at my head.

'I am so glad you guys are here. You know, it was great having my own room and all, but sometimes it can get a little lonely. This feels somewhat like the old days, when we used to room together. You know, before I lost my vision. It was so much fun, just us, playing football, basketball, tying up Mark.' I playfully added.

'Hey! You know, that wasn't any fun for me. You guys never included me in anything.'

'We didn't mean anything by it, Mark. You're our younger brother, you kind of stole mom and dad's attention when you were born. We had to do something to get revenge. We were kids.'

'And now?'

'Now we just don't like you.' I say with a smile. This time I do get a pillow thrown at me, but horribly missed.

'How could you miss that shot? I can't even duck.' Brad starts laughing, earning him a pillow right in the face. Now I start laughing.

'Oh, you think that's funny, shorty?' He comes up to me and hits me in the head with a pillow. 'Now it's not so funny, is it?' I don't stop laughing, I just grab my pillow and start swaying it around, waiting to hit someone.

'hey! That was me!' Ah, so now they're both close to me, okay...

'Randy? Are you okay?'

'Is something wrong? Why aren't you saying anything? Randy?' I wait until their voices are close enough and then swing the pillow as hard as I can. hitting them both in the head.

'Oh, you are so getting it now!' They start hitting me with their pillows, while we all laugh and I try to defend myself.

_Meanwhile, upstairs..._

'What are they doing down there?' Jill asks her husband as the loud noises coming from the basement, has made them both come downstairs and listen at the door. Tim just smiles.

'They're just trying to remind us that life is not over, just because something bad happens.'

'What?'

'Nothing. They're just having fun. Let's just go to bed, alright? Come on. I think it's about time we have our own talk about all of this. Don't you think maybe Randy's blindness has kind of affected us a little too much? I mean, he seems to have moved on. Maybe we should do the same.'

'Tim, what are you on about? Maybe we should go to bed, you're making way too much sense right now. And that's not a good sign...'

A/N Hi! Hopefully you guys like this chapter. I had to put some brotherly fluff in this story, since I did make it a family drama.

I know the drama part hasn't really been coming up yet, but it will. Just after the good part, which won't be long now ;)

Please R&R if you want to read more, let me know what you think. Thanks for everything!

Love, Baxxie


	4. Chapter 3 Prejudiced Minds

Chapter 3 Prejudiced Minds

Brad

  
It's been four months since the three of us had our late night talk. Things seem to be going better at home. Even mom seems to be coping better with Randy's "condition". Yeah, I know. I should be able to say it, but it's still difficult.

I keep thinking I should tell someone about the guilt I still feel, but I don't want to upset anyone. They'd probably yell at me anyway and tell me it's not true, but I don't feel like hearing it.

We're heading to the mall in half an hour. It's about time we spend some quality time as brothers again. I know Randy has been wanting to do that for a while, so Mark and I are treating him for some ice cream. It'll be a little strange, because Randy hasn't been out that much since he lost his sight. He's taking his white cane with him of course.

We've gone walking around town some, but we've never really gone to the mall anymore. It's just so crowded and there are a lot of people our age who don't deal well with his condition. It's happened before.

Some kids from my class came over to my house for a project and they started whispering as soon as he came into the room. he greeted them warmly with his normal happy smile, but they were just quiet. A lot of tension hung in the air and one guy actually made fun of him. Of course I sent them all home after that. Randy said he was fine, but I could tell it made him upset.

So today, Mark and I agreed we're not leaving him alone for one minute. He might not like it, but I want to make sure nothing happens.

_Two hours later..._

We've been taking it slow and have walked around a little, before going to the ice cream parlor. We ignored all the looks coming from the people who saw us. Randy has been very quiet ever since we got here. We still laughed and joked until we finished the ice cream and now he's quiet once again.

'Randy?' He turns his head towards me. 'Are you alright? You've hardly said anything since we got here.'

'Oh, well, I'm fine.' He laughs nervously, but I know he's lying.

'Randy.'

'They're all staring at me aren't they?' He whispers in a small voice. Mark gives me a worried glance.

'No, they're not.'

'yes, they are. You think I can't feel the eyes on my back? Because I can, you know.'

'Look, just ignore them. They're ignorant, they don't matter.'

'I know, I just... I don't know, somehow something doesn't feel right. I feel really uncomfortable.'

'Ok, it's ok. You want to go home?'

'I'm sorry, but I kinda do.'

'It's ok, don't worry about it. I'll just go pay for the ice cream and we'll go home. Mark, stay here, ok?' Mark nods as I get up. I sigh in frustration as I see the long line in front of me.

About five minutes later only one person has been helped. Apparently there's a problem with the cash register. I tap my foot on the round impatiently. I look around and I feel angry as I see Mark coming out of the bathroom. He walks over to me.

'Wow, what a line, huh?'

'Mark, what the hell are you doing here? I thought I told you to stay with Randy.'

'I had to use the bathroom. I couldn't just hold it in.'

'Damnit, Mark.' I hurry towards the table. Worry fills me as I notice it's empty. Mark looks scared and guilty.

'I'm sorry... I thought.. I thought one minute would be ok...' I sigh again.

'Look, it's ok. It's not your fault. Let's just go find him. I'll go left, you go right.' We hurry to find him, ignoring the yelling voice of an employee as he notices we haven't paid.

_Five minutes ago..._

Randy

The wary feeling I'm having, sitting here, is not going away. I don't know what it is, but I really want to leave, right now. It's been five minutes since Brad went to pay for the ice cream and I'm becoming restless. All of a sudden I can hear Mark getting up.

'Where are you going?'

'I'm just going to the bathroom, ok? I'll be right back, one minute, tops, ok?'

'yeah, Ok.' I feel embarrassed for sounding like a five year-old, scared of the boogieman. But I don't care. I just want to leave.

About ten seconds later I can hear someone standing at our table.

'Brad? Finally, we can get out of here.' I can feel his hand taking hold of my arm and I stand up, reaching for my cane. But it's not where I put it. 'Brad? Did you take my cane?' he doesn't respond. 'Brad? Why aren't you saying anything? Brad?' I can feel his face leaning in closer to me. As he's right next to me, I finally realize what my gut was telling me.

'I'm not Brad.' He whispers into my ear. My eyes widen and I struggle to get free. 'Don't say a word. I have some friends I want you to meet.' I go along quietly as he takes me somewhere unknown to me. We finally stop walking after about ten minutes. My heart is pounding as I hear other voices.

'Vinny! Dude, where have you been? Hey, who's your friend?'

'You guys remember Randy Taylor, don't you?' They laugh menacingly and I just hope Brad and Mark come to find me soon.

'Oh yeah, we remember him.' The McGurns... that's never good..

'Yeah, him and his brothers used to torment us.' We tormented them? No way!

'That's right. Or at least, they did, before Randy here lost his sight.'

'What? No way. So he can't see anything?' I can feel him waving his face in front of my eyes, but jump as he blows into my ear on my other side without making a sound. He starts laughing. 'Dude, this is awesome. This could be fun.' All of a sudden I can't hear anything anymore. I try to listen for sounds as my breathing gets heavier.

Then, out of nowhere, I can hear a sound behind me. But before I have a chance to react, something connects with my head, hard. I fall to the ground in an instant as I see stars. Then they start kicking me and hitting me with my own cane.

I try to defend myself, but they make sure to make as little sound as possible, catching me by surprise every time.

After about ten minutes of getting beaten, I finally hear the voice I've been longing for.

'hey! get away from him!' The guys just laugh.

'Oh look, it's Brad Taylor. Here to rescue his loser brother.' They grab my arm and twist it behind my back painfully. 'What are you going to do about it, Brad? Huh? You're going to beat us up? It's five to one. Not a lot of chance there.' There's five of them? Oh man...

'Actually, he's not alone.' I smile as I hear an male voice. 'I suggest you leave the boy alone or go to jail. What'll it be, boys?' I can hear Vinny growl, but he lets me go and I fall to the ground. 'Now you leave this mall and don't let me see you here ever again, or I'll call the cops.' I can hear them run away. I try to get away as I feel someone standing close to me and crouching down.

'Randy? Are you ok?'

'Randy? Oh my god... I am so sorry... I shouldn't have left you..' I can tell Mark is crying.

'I'm ok. Really, I am. But could we please go home now?' Brad carefully grabs my arm and I lean on him for support as I slowly get up again. I nearly fall down as a dizzy spell hits me.

'Actually, we're heading for the hospital first. Come on.' We head to the car and go straight to the hospital. Brad calls mom and dad as I'm being treated.

I really hope those two don't feel guilty about this as well. I really hope things become better soon, because this blindness is really starting to piss me off!

**--**

A/N Hi! Sorry for the long delay, I've been busy with the others and my inspiration was low. But here's another chapter. Don't worry, happy things will happen next chapter!

Please R&R if you want to read more. Thanks and Love, Baxxie  



	5. Chapter 4 Snow Falling

Chapter 4 Snow Falling

Randy

It's been some time since the "incident" at the mall and things at home are back to the way they were. Mom has become even more overprotective than she was before and even Brad and Mark won't let me out of their sight anymore. The only person treating me like a normal person, is dad. He still jokes around with me and makes me forget everything around me.

Even so, I'm becoming down again. That usually happens around the holiday season. Christmas is coming up soon and dad has been spending a lot of time putting up decorations for the lighting contest. And just like every year, Brad and Mark help him out and I have to stay inside. I haven't seen the lights for five years, but dad does try his best to describe them to me when he turns on the display.

Somehow, I think dad and I have gotten a lot closer since I lost my sight. I can tell he just wants to help me in any way he can and that I'm still his son. We still fool around like we always did, which I'm grateful for.

But still, Christmas is not my favorite time of the year anymore. In fact, I kind of hate it. I try to keep on a happy face for everyone, but of course they see right through me. I grow a lot quieter and don't really participate in any holiday traditions. I keep to the background. Yeah, they try to cheer me up, but mostly I just miss all the lights around the neighborhood and the smiles on children's faces light up when they open presents and meet Santa at the mall.

I'm only 15. It's just so unfair... I want to do all the things I used to do. Like help dad with the lighting display, like Brad and Mark. Going out and buy presents for everyone. Just enjoy life, ride a bike, go to school, watch a movie, go to a party, just have fun!

Now I'm just sitting on the couch, listening to the tv, but really just thinking about my screwed up life and getting more depressed by the minute. I can hear mom picking up the phone as it rings behind me. She seems to be concerned about something. But I'm not really paying attention.

At least not until she hangs up and goes outside to get dad. She tells him something outside, before coming back in and announcing to all three of us that they'll be going to grandma and grandpa's house. Apparently the Colonel slipped in the shower and is in the hospital. They'll be there for a few days and they'll ask Al to come and watch us.

They go upstairs to pack. When they come back downstairs, dad tells Mark and Brad that he wants them to continue working on the lighting display. When they come back, they'll finish it with dad, just in time for Christmas.

'Hey dad?' I ask.

'Yeah?'

'Maybe I could help. You know, with the lights. I wouldn't have to do much, but just something small. Maybe I could..' I can sense him coming to stand in front of me and sitting on the coffee table.

'Randy? I'm sorry, but you know that would be too dangerous. Everything that needs to be done, has to be done on the roof and you can't go up there.'

'But if someone just helps me up there, I could still help. I could just hand stuff to Brad and Mark and just sit there. They could watch me and then I could..' he grabs me by the shoulders gently.

'Randy, no. You can't, ok? I know you want to help. But we've been over this every year. It's just too dangerous, alright? You just keep Al busy and make sure he doesn't touch any of my tools or my car or.. just keep him out of the garage. Ok?'

'Ok.' I say in a small voice. I can hear him sigh.

'Look, we'll be back in a few days and I promise we'll go and do something. Just the two of us. We'll do whatever you want to do, ok?'

'Yeah, sure.' I add. But I know that everything I want to do is "too dangerous". It always is. He just wants to make me happy and forget about it. He ruffles my hair.

'That's my boy.' I turn my head away from him. He sighs again, but gets up. 'Ok, well, Jill? Have you called Al?'

'Yeah, he'll be here in about half an hour.'

'Ok. Well, then I guess we're set. Remember what I told you, Brad, Mark? Alright. We'll be back in two days at most. If it's longer we'll call. We'll call when we get there, ok? Stay out of trouble! Bye!' They both shout their goodbyes as they head outside.

In the meantime, I've already gotten up and because I know the way, I'm already outside. I know how to make as little sound as possible and am now feeling my way around the outside wall, for the ladder. When I finally find it, I carefully put my right foot on the first bar and slowly start to climb up.

I know what I'm doing is pretty stupid, but I want them to know that I'm still capable of doing stuff. I'm not crippled. I just want to live a semi-normal life and prove that I'm doing fine. I'm about halfway there and am concentrating so hard, I don't hear the back door opening.

'Randy! What the hell are you doing!' The shout scares the hell out of me and I loose my footing. I try to hold on, but I can feel myself slipping. I lost concentration and my senses aren't working. Now my hands are no longer gripping the bars, just air and as my right foot slips on the bar beneath me, I feel nothing but air as I start falling backwards. Pretty soon I just feel pain exploding at the back of my head as I hit the ground and my brothers shouting my name. Then, nothing but darkness...

Brad

I watch in horror as my brother falls to the ground in seconds and he's not longer moving.

'Randy! Oh shit!' Mark stands there frozen to the spot, staring at the snow under Randy's head, which is quickly turning red. 'Mark, go inside and get some blankets.' He doesn't respond. 'Mark! Go get blankets, now!' he seems to snap out of it. I try to see if he has more injuries and try to find a pulse. Thankfully, I find a strong beating pulse. I try to slap his face carefully, to try and wake him up.

'Randy? Can you hear me? Randy, please wake up.. I am so sorry...' I can't help the tears that fall from my eyes and I start to sob as I try to wake up my little brother. This is just way too familiar. This is the second time this has happened and again, it's my fault...

Mark comes sit next to me and hands me the blankets.

'We have to keep him warm and call and ambulance.'

'He shouldn't stay in the snow like this, it's wet and cold. We should either put him on the blankets or carry him inside.' Mark offers.

'We can't move him. We could break something. We should just call an ambulance and keep him warm by covering him with these blankets.' We put the blankets on him and Mark goes to get the cordless phone. I take it from him. But as soon as I start to dial, I notice Randy starting to wake up.

'Randy? Can you hear me?' He grunts as he tries to move. 'Just take it easy, don't move. I'm going to call for an ambulance, hold still.' He struggles to open his eyes. I start to dial again and wait to speak to someone.

'Hello? yes, hi, this is Brad Taylor. I need an ambulance. My younger brother fell off a ladder and his head is bleeding. We're at...' I start to say the address when I notice Randy is crying. I look down in concern. 'Uh, hold on for a moment.' I put my hand on the receiver. 'What is it? Randy, what's the matter?'

His head shoots up towards my face and he starts to put his hands on my face. I'm used to him doing that sometimes, but it seems different this time. His hands are feeling my face entirely, while he sobs and he seems to be... smiling?

'Randy?' I ask with uncertainty in my voice.

'Wow... you're like old...' He laughs during his sobs.

'What?' I look at Mark who shrugs. Now his head shoots towards Mark.

'Oh my god...' He whispers. He slowly sits up.

'Randy, stay still, you have to..' But he just keeps going and sits in front of Mark. mark looks on with concern as Randy starts to feel his face as well.

'I can't believe how much you've grown.. I hardly recognize you...' Slowly a light goes on as I look at Mark. He looks at me with wide eyes.

'Wait... Randy.. you can see him?' I completely forget about the ambulance and without thinking, I hang up. I slowly make my way towards Randy and Mark.

Randy glances up towards me and gasps in between his tears. He gets up slowly and Mark quickly stands up as well and steadies Randy as he walks over to me.

'Oh man. You're tall, dude!' He laughs and I can feel my own tears coming back, but this time I'm laughing as well. I pull him into a hug and soon the three of us are crying with happiness.

'I can see you guys... Oh my god, this is just amazing. Just look at the snow and the trees and our house. This is just... wow..' I can tell he's completely overwhelmed.

'This is great. We should call mom and dad and tell them what... oh, shit, the ambulance!'

'What?'

'I called 911, I was asking for an ambulance for you. You need to be checked out.'

'Brad, I'm fine. A little dizzy, but I'm fine.'

'Your head is bleeding.' He puts his hand on the back of his head and only smiles as he sees the blood.

'So I am.. I hardly feel it. I'm fine, I just need a towel I think, to stop the bleeding. We could just have Wilson take a look at it. He's pretty good at that.'

'He's not a doctor, Randy.'

'I know that, ok? I just don't like the feeling of going back to the hospital. I've been there a lot and last time I went there with a head wound, I woke up blind. Please?' I don't like it, but I do understand.

'Alright.. But if you feel any worse or you know, start to feel dizzy or faint or whatever, I'm calling the hospital again, you hear?'

'Yeah.. Could we go inside now? I'm kinda cold.'

After a few minutes we're inside. Randy is staring around him, watching in awe at all the new sights he sees. He's now holding a towel against his head. He gazes around, before getting up all of a sudden. Mark and I hurry after him in curiousness.

He goes downstairs and heads straight for his own room. He gasps at all the cool stuff dad put in for him. I can see him becoming emotional again as he touches all the things he hasn't seen in a long time. Including the pictures that are lined up on his desk, even though he was never able to see them.

Then, he opens his closet door and starts to carefully examine himself in the mirror.

'Man, I look different... Not taller, unfortunately, but still older. One thing though.'

'What?'

'What the hell happened to my hair?' he touches his spiked hair, and scrunches his face in disgust at the sticky hair product he feels. 'I mean, I could feel mom doing something to my hair, but this? Oh man, this is so coming out tonight. Or tomorrow. I've got too many things to see now.' We're so happy to see the smile on his face return to the fullest and finally reach his eyes again since five years ago. I can't wait for mom and dad to find out. This is going to be the best Christmas ever!

**--**

A/N Hi guys! Hope you enjoy this chapter. This story is far from over, it's only just beginning now. I am going to do some research first, so it might take a while putting up all of the chapters. Hope you don't mind ;)

Well, please R&R if you want to find out how Tim and Jill react and how about those McGurns?

Thanks and Love, Baxxie

  



	6. Chapter 5 I've Got My Eyes On You

Chapter 5 I've Got My Eyes On You

A few days later Jill and Tim arrive back home, where everyone acts as if nothing has happened. The boys are sitting in front of the tv and Randy is reading a book with his hands.

'Hi guys!' Jill says to her sons cheerfully as Tim carries the bags upstairs.

'Hi. How's grandpa?' Brad asks as he looks at his mother.

'He's fine. Your grandmother just overreacted.' Randy turns around for a moment and looks at his mother.

'Wow, mom. Is that a new dress?' Jill smiles.

'Yes, it is. Do you like it?'

'Yeah, black looks great on you.'

'Aw, thank you, honey.' Jill goes into the kitchen and is still smiling. A second later, she suddenly stops walking and the smile leaves her face. She turns around and looks at Randy again.

'Wait a minute,.. how did you know about this dress?' Randy turns around with a smile and looks her in the eye. As Jill notices, a hand flies to her mouth and she can't help the gasp and the tears that follow that gasp. She walks over to Randy. 'You can see me? Y-you can see?'

He nods with a smile and then stands up and walks towards her.

'Mom, please don't cry.'

'I can't help it.. my baby can see again!' She grabs Randy into a hug. 'Oh god, I have to tell your dad about this.'

'No, wait. If you don't mind, I want to tell him myself.'

'Oh, of course, sweetie.' She hugs him again and kisses him on the cheek, before letting go and going back into the kitchen quickly as Tim comes down the stairs. Randy sits on the couch again and starts to read.

Tim looks at Jill's tear struck face with raised eyebrows.

'Honey? Are you ok?'

'Huh? Oh, yeah, just these onions.' She was smart enough to grab onions and start slicing them, but she couldn't get the smile off her face.

_Later that day..._

Tim is on the roof working on the last of the Christmas lighting contest. He's making sure Santa won't fall off the roof again, like he did last year.

Mark and Brad are setting the table for dinner, while Jill is cooking and Randy decides to help Tim. he walks up the ladder, where Tim is fastening Santa to the roof. He can't see Randy, he only hears his footsteps.

'Oh, hey Mark. Could you hand me that screwdriver next to the chimney?' Randy shrugs his shoulders and grabs it. He hands it to Tim. 'Thanks, Mark.'

'Could you please stop comparing me to Mark?' Tim's head shoots up so fast, he hits his head on the Santa figure. He holds his head with his hands and looks up at Randy with shock.

'Randy? What the hell are you doing up here? Do you have any idea how dangerous it is up here? How did you get up here?' Randy raises his eyebrows.

'Uhm, I used the ladder?'

'Randy, you shouldn't be up here, it's way too dangerous.'

'Yeah, you said that.' Randy starts to walk further up the roof, towards a hole Tim made in the roof. He stares down at it, while Tim is watching him carefully and tries to figure out what's going on.

'Wow, this is a big hole. Does mom know about it?' Tim looks confused.

'I don't have to tell your mom everything.' Randy grins.

'Of course not. She'd kill you if she saw this.' He walks around again, stopping at the reindeer. 'Uhm, dad? Why is there a horse among the reindeer? You do know this is a horse right?' Randy grins at him, while Tim is slowly starting to get it with a smile.

'Yes, I know it's a horse. he wanted to join Santa. And who says horses aren't allowed to go with him? They're all animals. Santa shouldn't judge an animal just because it doesn't have antlers!' They both grin, before Tim grabs Randy and gives him a great bear hug.

They smile and then start to descend down the ladder.

'So when did you get your sight back?'

'The day you guys left actually. I fell off the ladder, woke up and stared straight into Brad's ugly face.' Randy chuckles.

'Wait, you fell off the ladder?'

'Well, yeah, but I'm fine now.' They go inside and for the first time since five years, the Taylor family smiles all through their family meal, despite the black vegetables and green meatloaf on their plates.

**--**

A/N Hi guys! Sorry for the late update. I've just started school since two years, so I'm trying to get settled in here and therefore I don't have that much time to write right now. But I'm trying and I'll try to update my other stories as soon as possible.

I hope you guys like this short chapter. So, the family is happy again, but will it last? Just read the summary and you'll understand ;)

Please R&R if you want to find out what happens next!

Thanks for everything and Love, Baxxie  



	7. Chapter 6 New Beginnings

Chapter 6 New Beginnings

Randy

_Dear Journal,_

Finally things are going great again. It's been a few months since I got my sight back and I'm feeling great. I haven't been able to start school yet, since the school year already began and I have to take some sort of test to see if I'm ready to start in the grade I'm supposed to be in. That's okay, at least I know after the holidays, I'll finally go back to school.

Yes, I sound like a nerd, but I have missed it. I don't really have any friends left, so I will be the "new guy". Oh well, It'll have to do. Can't have everything, right?

Dad has changed the house back to normal as well, so now we have a new front door and an entirely new kitchen. Mom made sure dad didn't help this time, so it looks great.

The mood in the house is so much better. Somehow, I think this experience has made us closer as a family. Especially the bond between me and my brothers is a lot tighter, which is great. I have my bedroom back to myself now, but for fun, we still like to have sleepovers with just the three of us. We just talk and have fun. We don't have too much time left, because Brad and I will head to college soon (it feels great to think that!). So we're making the best of it.

Oh, we have new neighbors across the street. They moved in next to Jeremy. It's a couple mom and dad's age, with one daughter, my age. Her name is Samantha and she is gorgeous. We've been talking a lot and are really hitting it off. I haven't had the courage to ask her out yet, but I might do that soon.

But even though everything is going so well right now, mom is still overprotective of me. No one is even allowed to smack my head when I say something annoying. She thinks something might happen. It's good for me, but the others aren't so happy about it. Especially Brad. Mark and I have so much fun embarrassing him in front of his new girlfriend, Angela. Wow, I never knew a girl could talk that much and that fast about absolutely nothing. She's perfect for Brad.

Not that Mark comes off easy. Or me for that matter. I mean, besides all the fun, we're still brothers, so it's our job to annoy each other. Although Brad and Mark are a lot more careful around me. Which can upset me. I'm not a china doll. I don't want to be treated differently, but dad still seems to be the only one who gets that.

What the fuck is their problem anyway? I never changed, I never asked for all this "special" attention. Damn Brad.. if it wasn't for him, none of this would ever have happened! If he hadn't d

whoa, I better stop writing.. my head is starting to hurt. I guess I've been staring at this paper too long.

Until next time!

_Randy_

**--**

A/N Hiya! Again, sorry for the delay, I'm trying to pick everything back up, so expect more updates this weekend :)

Let me know what you think and let me know if you have any questions ;)

Thanks for reading!

Love, Baxxie  



	8. Ch 7 Strange After Dinner Conversations

Chapter 7 Strange After Dinner Conversations__

The Taylor family is eating dinner. Everyone is chatting away, while eating, like any normal family would.

'So, Randy. You and Samantha have gotten really close together lately, huh?' Randy looks at his dad.

'Huh, what?'

'You've been spending a lot of time together lately.'

'Oh, yeah. I really like her.' He starts eating again, while not realizing what he said. Everyone exchanges glances.

'Oooh, Randy has a girlfriend, Randy has a girlfriend. Randy and Samantha sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i..' Brad and Mark start.

'Stop it, you guys. He can like her if he wants to, but they are just friends.' They just snicker, while Randy silently thanks his mother and tries to hide his blushing.

After dinner Brad and Mark are outside playing soccer, while Randy does his homework. After that he heads outside as well. Brad kicks the ball to him immediately and he catches it. Mark and Brad head over to him with a big smile.

'So, Randy.. You like Samantha, huh?' Brad says as he puts an arm around his brother's shoulder. Randy just rolls his eyes and brushes Brad's arm off his shoulder.

'We're just friends, Brad.'

'That's not what I asked. You said you really like her. How much do you like her?'

'Oh, come on, Brad.'

'No, seriously, I just want to know.'

'Yeah and when I tell you, you'll either run to Samantha and tell her or just make fun of me, right?' Brad looks at Mark and smiles.

'No, I won't.' Randy shakes his head. 'Oh, come on, just tell us!' Randy turns away and Brad grabs his arm gently to turn him around again. Randy turns around and Brad and Mark are shocked to see the anger in his eyes.

'You know what? Why don't you just back the fuck off, Brad!' Brad and Mark take a step back and look at Randy in confusion as he starts to walk towards them in a menacing way. 'It's none of your business. So just shut the hell up, both of you!'

'Randy, chill out, man. We were just teasing you.'

'Well, don't. I'm getting real sick of it.' With that he turns around again and starts to head towards the back door.

'Wow, someone got up from the wrong side of the bed this morning.' Mark says to Brad quietly. Randy hears it and turns around. He strides towards Mark.

'What did you say?' Mark looks confused. 'I asked you a question!' Mark begins to feel scared as Randy grabs him by the shirt. Brad steps in and grabs Randy's arm away.

'What the hell do you think you're doing?' Randy brushes his arm off with force.

'Leave me ALONE!' He shouts the last word as he pounces on Brad and starts to swing his arm around. But Brad is stronger and faster and dodges the blows. He manages to get a good grip on Randy, before pushing him off of him. They both lie on the grass, breathing heavily.

'Jesus Randy... What the hell has gotten into you?' Randy starts to look confused and shakes his head while he squeezes his eyes shut. When he opens them, he looks at Brad, lying on the grass and both of his brothers looking at him in confusion and shock. He gets up hastily.

'I uhm... I have a headache, excuse me..' He heads inside and brushes past his parents who look at him in confusion.

He heads to his room and the minute he shuts the door behind him, he sinks down to the floor and tries to get his breathing under control.

'What just happened? I can't believe I just hit Brad like that.. Why did I.. Ahhh...Damn it!' He grabs his head as pain shoots through. He waits for the pain to stop, before walking towards his bed and lying down. He falls asleep soon after, still wondering about the strange moment that just occurred....

**--**

A/N Hi there! Again sorry for the long wait, but I really want to get these chapters right. I hope you like this one!

Please let me know what you think, it's my only story for now :)

Thanks for all and much Love, Baxxie


	9. Chapter 8 Green Fingers

Chapter 8 Green Fingers

Randy

Dear Journal,

It's been a few weeks since my fight with Brad and Mark. Things are still a little uneasy between us, but neither of them have said anything about it. I guess they chose to forget about it.

I've been having more headaches lately. And the scary part is, I've been having blackouts lately as well. Thankfully nothing bad happened that I know of, but the thought of missing a few minutes to a few hours without knowing what happened, it creeps me out.

I'm not sure if anyone has noticed anything off about me, but if they have, they haven't said anything. Which I'm grateful for. Mostly because I have been doing so much better and everyone was finally treating me somewhat normal again. I don't want to go back to the "china doll" treatment. That's why I've been keeping low and making sure to pretend I'm fine, even when my head feels like it's about to explode.

I am so freaking out about all of this. I want to talk to someone, but I think I'm too scared to find out what's going on. I am too afraid that I'm going to go blind again. I really don't want to go back to that, I want to see!

Why does this

I feel so weird. Oh, my head is killing me...

I slowly open my eyes and blink slowly to adjust my blurry sight. What the...

As I finally see my surroundings, I gasp as I find myself in some kind of forest. Well, at least, I see trees all around and I can hear water nearby.

My heart starts beating out of my chest as I find I have no idea where I am or how I got here. What time is it? What day is it? Am I even in Detroit anymore? Oh god... This is really not good...

I carefully sit up, but as I try to stand, I hiss at the pain I feel in my ankle. I look down and see my clothes completely torn and dirty. And there's blood on my shirt. I try to look for a wound, but I can't find it. Until I feel my head, that is.

Oh, great. A head wound. Like my head wasn't hurting enough already...

Ok, just settle down Randy.. I'm in the middle of nowhere, I need to find out where I am and find my way back home.

I carefully get up and try to fight through the pain shooting through my ankle. I look for a big stick to lean on and use as a crutch. When I do, I start to walk around and see if I can find anything that looks familiar. By the looks of it, it's early in the morning right now. The sun is just coming up. I try to think back about my sense of direction. North is... Ah, my head.... Ok, don't think too hard. Duly noted.

Let's see... Wait.. I look around at the trees and finally spot something familiar. One of the enormous tree has something carved into it. My own initials. So at least I'm still in Detroit. The lake.. I'm at the lake. What.. How the hell did I get here? Oh man, I really hope I haven't been here too long. Mom and dad must be worried sick right now.

What's the last thing I remember? I was writing in my journal.. which was right after school. In the afternoon.. Oh no... I wonder what else happened in that time..

I carefully and slowly limp home, trying to not pass out because of the sudden dizziness setting in.

I inhale deeply as I finally see our neighborhood dooming up and soon our house. Ok, I guess I should prepare myself for the worst. Oh well, so much for me pretending nothing is going on. Try talking yourself out of this situation...

**--**

A/N Hi! Sorry for the long wait, again.. I head writer's block for this story. But I got an idea again and sorry for the short chapter, but I will continue what happens in the next chapter.

I hope you like it, let me know and what do you think happened? ;)

Thank you for reading and Love, Baxxie


	10. Chapter 9 Memories

Chapter 9 Memories...

Randy

I take another deep breath before I make my way towards the front door and carefully knock. I don't know if anyone is up yet, or out searching for me. But I have to try.

Thankfully someone does open the door. Mom gasps as she sees me.

'Randy? What happened to you? Oh my god..'

'Well.. ' I try to walk, but more pain shoots through my ankle.

'What's wrong with your leg?'

'It's not my leg, it's my ankle. I think I must have sprained it.'

'Come on, I'll help you inside.' She takes my arm and leads me towards the dining table.

'Where is everyone?' I ask her as she looks for a cloth and makes it wet.

'They're still sleeping. What happened?' Still sleeping? So they didn't notice I was gone?

'Uh, I was at the lake. I eh... I tripped and fell. I hit my head and twisted my ankle.'

'The lake? Why were you at the lake? I thought you were staying at Jeremy's.'

'Jeremy?'

'Yeah. Hold still.' I hiss as she dabs my head wound. 'Oh, this looks serious, Randy. Why don't I just get dressed and get you to a doctor.'

'No!' She looks surprised. 'I mean, no.. I don't need a doctor. I'm fine.' I know she doesn't believe me, by the look she gives me.

'Let me see your ankle.' I hiss louder as she carefully looks at my ankle. 'Oh yeah, you're fine alright.' She shakes her head. 'We're seeing a doctor. But let's get you cleaned up first.'

'But about Jeremy. You mean I was sleeping over there?' She gives me a confused look.

'Yeah, remember you came upstairs and told us you were going over to Jeremy's. Then you came back and said you were sleeping over. So I really don't get what you were doing at the lake this early in the morning.' I try to get my head around this. What else did I do yesterday? I need to talk to Jeremy..

'Oh, well, I just felt like taking a walk. You know, fresh air is good for you.'

'Yeah, I guess so.' While mom goes to get dressed, I try to think back to the day before. I am trying to remember what else I did. I missed half a day.. Half a day! That's just insane.. What the hell is happening to me?

'Whoa, what happened to you?' I look up and see my brother.. uh... I start to panic... 'Randy? I'm talking to you. What happened?'

'I uh, I had a little accident near the lake.' I say with a shrug. he just grins and shakes his head. I give a fake smile, while I'm still panicking and start giving myself a bigger headache. I groan suddenly as my head feels like it's about to split open.

'What? What is it?' My brother sounds panicked now.

'My head, it just hurts a little.. I'm ok, really.'

'Yeah right.. You don't look fine to me.'

'I'm fine.. uh.. damnit!'

'Brad, good, you're up. Listen, I'm taking Randy to the hospital. Could you tell your dad when he wakes up. Tell him not to worry and we'll be back in a few hours probably.' Brad! Oh my god.. I can't believe this.. I actually didn't remember his name....

I try to keep my face neutral as I am losing it on the inside.. This is so not normal.. But I can't tell mom.. I just can't..

We head to the ER and they wrap my ankle in bandages. They did an X-Ray, but it really was just a sprain. Thankfully they didn't comment on my head too much. I just told them I didn't feel dizzyness or pain, so they just put stitches in it and I tried to keep up a happy face and mask the pain.

Mom didn't ask anymore questions on the way home, thank god. I just sit on the couch with her help and put up my foot. It doesn't take too long before I start to feel sleepy. I try to fight it, because who knows what will happen? But I'm just not strong enough and now know for sure that whatever I did yesterday, I didn't sleep. That's for sure...

--

**A/N **Hi! Sorry if the chapter is kind of confusing, I just couldn''t get anything straight right now. Oh well, I hope you like it anyway :)

What could be going on with Randy? Will it get worse? Will he have lost more time when he wakes up? Or will it be even worse this time?

Find out by R&R-ing!

Thank you for all and Love, Baxxie


	11. Chapter 10 Confide In Me

Chapter 10 Confide In Me

Randy

Somewhere in the distance I hear a voice calling my name. I feel dizzy and my body hurts. Am I still sleeping? I can feel someone touching me, but I'm not sure if it's real or just a dream.

The voice is becoming clearer and I start to come back to reality. I open my eyes and as my vision loses it's blurriness, I start to recognize Jeremy staring at me with a concerned look.

'Jeremy? What are you doing here?'

'Dude, I've been trying to wake you for like ten minutes. I came here to talk to you about what happened two days ago. I mean, you ran off so upset after our fight. I thought you ran home, but then your mom told me about the lake. How the hell did you end up there anyway? And how did you get hurt? Man, if I had known, I would have..'

'Jeremy!' he looks at me.

'What?'

'Just slow down for a minute. My head hurts and I'm kinda dizzy, so please slow down.'

'Oh, right, sorry. Look, about that fight, I'm really sorry. I was out of line.' Despite the dizziness I try to think back to that night. We had a fight? About what? Should I apologize too?

'Uh, you know, let's just forget about it. It doesn't matter.'

'No, I can't do that. Look, I'm sorry about the fight, but I was serious about what I said. Something is wrong with you and I just want to help you. But how can I do that when you keep denying it?'

'Huh?'

'Oh come on, Randy.. You know what I mean. When you were at my house you seemed like a completely different person. I mean, you were very disrespectful to my family and you actually ate meat.'

'What?'

'Don't act like you don't remember this. I didn't come over here to fight, I just want to know what's going on. Please just tell me.' I have to fight the urge to tell him about everything that's been going on. If I tell him, at least I'll have someone to confide in. But I can't risk him telling my family.

'I.. Jeremy, look.. I'm really sorry about the way I acted. I didn't mean to offend anyone.. I guess I was just not feeling well..'

'Of course.. you weren't feeling well. Just cut the bullshit, man. I'm your best friend, remember? I know you and that night? That wasn't you. Even my mom could tell.' I lay my head down on the couch and let out a deep sigh. 'I'm just worried about you.'

And that's where everything goes wrong...

All of a sudden I come crashing back to earth and I'm lying on the floor, with Jeremy on top of me. He has a firm grip on my arms and I realize I'm trying to fight him. I panic at the strength in my arms and let go. I look at my best friend with wide eyes and then turn away in shame. I can feel him letting go and he gets off me.

I quietly get up from the floor without looking at him. But when I fall back down because of my ankle, he grabs my arms and leads me to the couch. At least we're still in the same house. And thankfully, there's still no sign of my family. I sit down and still avoid his gaze.

'Thanks.' I say in a near whisper.

'No problem.' He answers in a cold voice.

'Jeremy, I..'

'What? You weren't feeling well again? Randy, I just don't know what to do anymore. I mean, one minute we're talking and the next I know you just attack me for no reason. You still want to say nothing is going on? That this is normal?' He yells at me and I can feel my eyes water up. 'It isn't normal Randy! Are you even listening to me? Just tell me what is going on!' He turns me towards him and I try to hide the tears running down my face. 'Randy.. what just happened? Why did you attack me?' he asks in a softer voice.

'I don't know..' I answer in a whisper.

'What?'

'I don't know, ok? I don't know why I attacked you.. I can't even remember doing it in the first place!' I yell as I get up and again forget my ankle. I quickly sit back down as I feel the pain shooting through it.

'What do you mean, you don't remember?'

'I can't remember attacking you.. I just remember us talking and the next thing I know we're on the floor and you're holding my arms down... I blacked out..'

'This wasn't the first time, was it? That you had a black-out?' Jeremy asks me carefully. I shake my head no as I quietly start to sob. I hear Jeremy let out a deep sigh. 'When you ended up at the lake.. you blacked out then too?'

'I don't even remember agreeing to come over to your house, let alone what happened while I was there.. I just woke up at the lake and went home..'

'Oh my god.. I knew I should have gone after you.. I am so sorry.. If I had come after you, you wouldn't be hurt right now..'

'No, who knows what might have happened if you were there...' In the next half hour I tell him everything that's happened so far.

'Wow, this is just.. how long has this been going on?'

'A few weeks I guess. At least, as far as I know.. You're not going to tell my parents about this, are you?'

'Randy, you've been having blackouts and really bad headaches. This is too serious to keep from you parents. Who knows what's going on?'

'You need to promise me not to..' He looks hesitant.

'You can't ask me that...'

'Jeremy, please.. I don't want them to know.. They'll just go back to treating me differently again. I like the way things are now..'

'What, not knowing what you did all day? And then passing out from a headache? This is too big, Randy, I can't.

'Please.. You're my best friend.. I promise if this doesn't go away by itself and it becomes worse, I'll let them know myself.. Please promise you won't tell them.'

'Randy..'

'Promise...' He still looks hesitant and sighs heavily.

'I know I'm going to regret this.. Alright, I promise I won't tell anyone. If, you make sure to say something straight away when it happens again and especially when it becomes worse. You got it?' I give him a thankful smile.

'Yeah, I got it. Thank you.'

'Yeah, sure man, that's what best friends are for.'

**--**

A/N Hi! I hope you like this chapter. If it's too strange, let me know!

If anyone has any ideas for more blackouts of Randy, please let me know by PM or in a review, all help is greatly appreciated!

Thank you for all and Love, Baxxie


	12. Chapter 11 Sweet Talks and Kisses

Chapter 11 Sweet Talks and Kisses

Randy

It's been a week since I told Jeremy about what happened. I feel so much better now that I have someone to talk to. But I also feel guilty for making him keep a secret like this. He's been at my side whenever possible, to make sure nothing bad happens.

Thankfully I only had one blackout this week and because he was there, everything was fine. Apparently I tried to cuss out my dad, but he kept me away from my family. I did cuss and yell at him and I feel bad about it, but he said it was ok.

Thankfully so far nothing has happened at school. We don't always have the same classes. I just can't imagine what would happen if I blacked out there, right in front of everyone. They would all think I'm insane.. And mom and dad would find out.

Right now I'm at the arcade with Jeremy and Samantha. Jeremy is sitting next to me at a table while Samantha is talking to a friend. I'd rather be alone with her, but I'm not sure what to do. I know the blackouts haven't happened as much, but what if I have one with Samantha? What if I did something horrible? And what if I didn't? Maybe we would get closer.. Maybe I'd even get to kiss her. Whoa, what am I thinking, we're hardly even dating. She's not just going to kiss me. As much as I want her to, she just won't.

'Yo Randy? Hello?' I look up and see Jeremy waving a hand in front of my face.

'What?'

'Dude, I've called your name like five times already. Quit the daydreaming, she's not going to like you anymore if you keep staring at her and spacing out.'

'I wasn't staring at her.'

'Uhm, you were practically drooling over her, man. And even though she does like the attention, you need to watch it.' I open my mouth to say something, but close it again.

'I know. I just can't help it. I mean, just look at her. She's gorgeous. That smile just warms the room and those eyes, I could get lost in those forever, oh and those lips..' I look at Jeremy who's looking at me like he just ate something very wrong.

'Dude, you sound like a girl. Now start talking normal, you're making me nauseous.'

'Oh, shut up.' I say with a smirk, that he returns. I look away and see Samantha standing next to me again.

'Oh, thanks.' She sits down next to me and for what seems like forever, no one says anything. Every time we look at each other, we just smile, but that's it. Jeremy nudges me. I make a gesture and we start to argue in body language. Then I remember Samantha, who is looking at us in a strange way.

For the next half hour we start talking about everything and nothing. I don't even notice Jeremy getting up and going home. It's not until I notice how dark it's becoming outside, that we stop and decide to go home. On the way we still talk about our families. I tell her some more about the accidents my dad has had. She laughs at my stories about the accidents dad caused. God, I love the way she laughs.

I walk her to the front door and then things get quiet again. That is, before she starts to talk.

'Randy, I've had a really great day. I really like hanging out with you, we always have so much fun together.' I smile at her and she returns it.

'Yeah, we do, don't we.'

'Yes, we really do.' Her voice gets softer as she moves closer to me. My heart is pounding and my breath hitches as our faces are inches away from each other. We lean in closer. I feel so nervous, but everything around us disappears as our lips touch for the first time.

The kiss seems to go on forever and as we finally let go and look at each other, we both have big smiles.

'Wow, that was..'

'Amazing.' She finishes the sentence for me.

'Yeah, it really was.' Again everything around us disappears, but this time I know it's not right. It's too late to warn her or to run...

I slowly open my eyes and find myself still in front of Samantha's house. But everything has changed. I'm lying on the ground and as I slowly get up, I can feel my cheek stinging. I look around and when I finally spot Samantha, my heart drops. She's crying, while she's sitting on the ground, with her knees up to her chin and her head on her arms. She seems to be shaking. I can't help but notice her tousled hair and wrinkled shirt.

'Samantha?' I carefully call her name. She doesn't respond. I start to walk towards her. When she sees me, she shoots further away.

'No, don't come near me. Just stay there.' I gulp as I realize this might be worse than I ever thought could happen.

'Samantha.. I just want to say I'm sorry.. I.. I am so sorry..' I don't know what for, but I need to let her know. I know she can now hear my own tears coming through these words.

'Just leave.. Please..' It comes out as a whisper, but the emotion in that plead, it just breaks my heart...

--

**A/N **Sorry to stop here, I wanted to let you guess about what happened here. I will make sure to update soon and let you know, I promise!

Please R&R to find out soon!

Love, Baxxie


	13. Chapter 12 The Wrong Words

Chapter 12 The Wrong Words

Randy

I stand here on Samantha's doorstep, trying to figure out what to say. I feel awkward standing here, watching her as she still cries on the cold ground.

'Samantha?' I start quietly. No response. I sigh frustratingly before I sit down as well in front of her. She turns her head away from me. 'Sam, please talk to me.'

'Don't call me that.' She says without looking at me.

'Samantha, please look at me. I want to talk about this.' She slowly turns her head and I sigh at the resentment in her eyes. 'I am so sorry for what I did.' I know she can see the dried up tears on my cheeks and the fresh ones starting as I see her own tears. 'I didn't mean to hurt you.'

'You have a funny way of showing it.' She shakes her head. 'How could you say that to me? I mean, first you kiss me in a way I have never been kissed before.. Then I say how good it was and you tell me you've had better?' She now gets up and is angry, while I am now confused rather than scared. 'And then.. Then you have the nerve to tell me it was a good night, but we shouldn't see each other anymore? I am a great person, but you have a reputation to worry about.' My eyes widen as I wipe off my tears and slowly get up.

Oh my god.. I thought I raped her or something.. She is now walking around and saying more things I said, while getting angrier by the minute.

'Samantha..'

'..I just can't believe you of all people would say something like that. How did I ever fall for this? You never really liked me..'

'Samantha!'

'What?'

'I didn't mean it.' She stops walking and looks me straight in the eye.

'Excuse me?'

'I didn't mean what I said. I was.. joking?' I try to convince her with it.

'Yeah, right. You sounded serious enough. Trust me Randy, you are not a very good liar and yet, you convinced me.'

'I guess I've just gotten better at lying over the years.' She turns away again. 'Samantha, please. I really did not mean what I said to you. I do like you and that kiss.. It was out of this world.' So much, that I don't remember it. 'Sam..'

'Just don't, ok.'

'What can I do to make you believe me?' Then it hits me. I smile and grab her by the shoulders. I turn her towards me and kiss her with all the passion I have inside of me. She starts to kiss me back and it turns into a heated make-out session.

We finally have to stop to catch our breaths. She looks at me with wide eyes.

'I..' I put my finger on her lips.

'I care about you. I'm not sure what it is, but I have feelings for you. I have never felt this way about anyone. Is it love? Maybe. Who knows? All I know is that I want to be with you. I was stupid to say those things to you, while I didn't mean any of them. Please forgive me.'

'You were really joking?' She looks hesitant.

'I made it all up.' I tell her and I nod.

'Wow. You have a really bad sense of humor.' I laugh as she smiles.

'Yeah, more people think that. I don't always think before I talk and I'm working on it. I promise I won't say things like that to you again.'

'Well, if you really promise, I guess I have no choice but to forgive you.' She hugs me as I sigh of relief. Thank god...

I managed to save my ass in this one. But what if it happens again? What if I do do something else besides saying the wrong thing?

We say goodbye and I head home while she finally goes inside. Man, this is becoming more difficult to hide.. I need to be more careful.

**--**

A/N Hi! Here is another chapter. So, it wasn't as bad this time. But who knows what might happen in the future?

R&R to find out. Thank you for the reviews so far, it makes everything worth while :)

Love, Baxxie


	14. Chapter 13 Message received

Chapter 13 Message received

Randy

It's been a few weeks since my "incident" with Samantha. Ever since we've been getting a lot closer. Minus those few dates I can no longer remember, it's been great.

Apparently I can do good things when I'm blacking out as well. I was told I helped a blind person cross the street at the last minute and I ran as fast as I could to catch a guy that stole someones purse. I have never been so tired in my life and almost couldn't catch my breath, but according to my mom, I could have run a marathon and won. This could work in my advantage. If only I didn't blackout every time I did something weird or cool.

To celebrate our three weeks anniversary in two days, I decided to go buy Sam a present. I've been walking through the mall for a few hours now and I can't seem to decide what to get. I look around one last time and then find a very nice small second hand store. She told me she really likes the whole Fifties era with Marilyn, Elvis and James Dean.

I start to look around the store and find a really nice painting with all three icons in a bar. I know it's not jewelry, but she told me she doesn't like fancy gifts like that. Gotta love the girl for trying. So I'll just give her the painting first before giving her the silver bracelet I bought her earlier this afternoon.

I step outside, happy with the gift and start towards the exit when a familiar voice stops me.

'Well, if it isn't Randy Taylor.' Oh no... not again.

'Hey Vinnie, isn't this like deja-vu or something?'

'Yes, it is. The loser, alone again. Where's your cane, dude? You got us into a lot of trouble last time, kid. But don't worry. We'll finish you this time.' I hear them coming closer. I can still rely on my hearing senses and smile when I hear an object coming from behind me. I move out of the way just in time.

'What was that?' One of his friends asks.

'Dude, you made too much noise. He's blind, remember? Not deaf. Be quiet this time.' I hear them coming closer and I do my best not to roll my eyes as one of them moves in front of me. I get ready. As two of them move to strike at the same time, I move out of the way and they hit each other in the face.

'Ouch, now that had to hurt.' I smirk.

'Yo Vinnie! I thought you said he couldn't see?'

'Oh, I guess you didn't get the news. Yeah, I got my sight back some time ago. Perfect vision now.' I say with a smile.

Vinnie and his friends look angry now. 'Aw, I'm sorry. Did I disappoint you? Oh well, I'll just go now.'

I turn around and walk out the door. When I'm outside I can hear them behind me. I start to run as fast as I can and can hear them picking up the pace as well. I keep running when I see an alley up ahead. I run into it and notice too late that they've caught up. One of them jumps and lands on top of me, sending us both toppling to the ground. Then, my vision starts to cloud. Oh no...

I slowly open up my eyes and immediately hiss at the pain I feel in my hand. I bring it to my face and am shocked to see my knuckles torn and bleeding. The same goes for my other hand. I can feel some blood trickling down my mouth as well. Split lip. Oh, great.

I slowly get up and thankfully can't feel any other painful spots. I blink to clear my vision further and am shocked to see it's almost dark outside. I look around me and fight the urge to scream as I see Vinnie and his friends lying around me in the alley unconscious. Blood is everywhere, on the ground, the dumpster, the walls.

Suddenly I can hear one of them groaning. I hurry towards him and crouch down when he opens his eyes. I want to ask him if he's okay, but the moment he sees me, his eyes go wide and he tries to scramble away as fast as he can.

'Are you..' He puts up his hands as in defence.

'Don't touch me, man. I swear it wasn't my idea. I'm sorry.. Just please don't hurt me again..' I feel panic rising when the guy starts to cry out of fear.

He's afraid. Of me... I slowly get up.

No, this isn't happening.. I didn't do this.. I didn't hurt them.... Oh god... I look at my bruised knuckles again and then start to run. I don't even know where I'm going, but I have to get out of here.

I keep running until I can't run anymore. I sit down against a tree and pull my knees up to my chin, letting the tears roll down my face.

How did it come to this? I can't believe I've let it get this far... I need to do something... I have to..Ah, my head...

This time the tears running down my face are more a result of the killer pain shooting through my head right now. Oh, this is my own fault.. I should have told mom and dad the first time it happened..

Oh god, what if they go to the police? I'll go to jail.. Owww... I need help, right now...

I carefully get up and have to do my best not to topple over. My vision is blurring and turning because of my head and the tears, but I need to get help..

I just keep walking and finally reach a house.. I look up and without knowing it, I reached my own house... I knock on the door hard, until dad opens it.

'Randy? What..' He doesn't get to finish his question as I finally crash down to the floor, gripping my head and screaming.

'Make it stop... Please! Make the pain go away...' I sob and cry out again. I vaguely hear dad yelling at mom in the background. I start blinking heavily, noticing my vision is starting to double now.

'Randy, can you hear me? Randy?' My dad is swaying in front of and I try to get up to steady myself. 'Randy?'

'I don't feel so good..' I barely have time to say it, before my knees buckle out from under me. I can feel dad catching me in his arms and scooping me up.

'Let.... no time... dri..... hosp....' I only catch snippets of his voice, before he rushes out and I black out. For once, I'm thankful....

--

**A/N **I completely let this story slip to the background. But I'm back with new ideas and I hope you like them!

Thank you for everything so far and I hope you will continue to read and review :)

Love, Baxxie


	15. Chapter 14 Explaining

Chapter 14 Explaining

Tim

I haven't been so scared since the day we last found Randy unconscious in his bed all those years ago. When he finally woke up in the hospital he had lost his sight. I noticed something was going on with him, but I figured he was just having trouble getting used to a normal life again.

Now here I am, driving to the hospital with my middle son in the back, unconscious once again, being held by a frantic Jill. I try to keep my emotions at bay. I don't want us to crash..

I can't help but go back to that moment opening the door and finding him there, pale and screaming while holding his head in pain. I don't think I'll ever forget the way his eyes rolled into the back of his head and me barely having time to catch him as he drops to the ground.

Why does this have to happen to him every time? Oh god, what could be wrong with him now? Do I even want to know? Please let him be ok....

The moment I see the hospital sign, I speed up and rush towards the entrance. I ignore the looks the people around the ER are giving me. I open the back door and carry my son through the doors.

'I need a doctor. My son needs help.' I tell the nurse working at the front desk. One look at my frantic face makes her realize it's serious. She calls a doctor, who rushes out to meet us. Jill is now shakily standing beside me, trying not to break down, I can tell.

We follow the doctor to a bed and I carefully lay him down. The doctor starts to examine him, but soon finds he has just passed out. He asks us to wait with him until he wakes up, while he goes to see another patient.

I swear I saw him roll his eyes. Strange guy. He didn't even introduce himself. I read his card though, Dr. Masterson. He better apologize when he gets back.

I sigh and slowly walk over to Jill, putting my arm around her and offering comfort. She immediately puts her arms around me and lets out more tears.

Randy

Oh wow, I feel weird... My head hurts... I slowly open my eyes and as my vision becomes clear, I start to realize I'm in the hospital.

'Randy, you're awake. Thank god..' I look next to me and my dad's concerned face is right there, with mom standing next to him with tear stained cheeks.

'Dad? What happened?' I ask in a groggy voice. The room spins as I try to sit up too fast.

'Slow down, kiddo. You fainted, remember? You seemed to be in so much pain.. And what happened to your hands?' Before I can start answering dad's questions, a doctor steps in. I guess a nurse must have gotten him.

'So, I see your finally awake, Mr. Taylor.'

'Uhm, apparently.'

'Your parents told me you were in a lot of pain and holding your head before you fell unconscious.' I start thinking about that and it starts to come back. Oh my god... Those guys.. Vinnie and his friends. It's making my head hurt all over again.

'Do you remember what happened?'

'Yes, I do...' I answer in a quiet voice. The doctor starts checking my vital signs, including shining a penlight into my eyes.

'Besides the enormous headache, is there anything else?' I look at the ground in shame as I realize I better tell them what's been going on.

'I guess it all started some time after I got my sight back....' I tell them everything from the beginning. Mom and dad look at me with sad faces and a hint of disappointment. The doctor just gives me a blank stare.

'Well, I have to say, after all the tests I've done so far, I have found nothing out of the ordinary. Mr. and Mrs. Taylor, could I speak to you outside in the hall for a moment?' I watch them follow the strange doctor outside.

I am now sitting up on the bed, fidgeting. I feel nervous and I can't stand being talked about without me being there. I mean, it has to be bad, right? He needs to prepare them for it before telling me.

Okay, I can't take this anymore. I get off the bed and quietly sneak out into the hall, just close enough to hear what they have to say.

'...can't be serious.' Okay, dad sounds upset. Just not in the way I thought he would be.

'Mr. Taylor, I can understand you're upset about hearing this. But we see this very often. Your son might not even fully be aware of what he is doing.'  
Huh?

'Look, Doctor. You might have studied for all of this, but I know it's bullshit!'

'Mr. Taylor, I would strongly advise you to..'

'Don't tell me what to do. How dare you! I saw my son screaming in pain, holding his head and collapsing into my arms, still in pain. He was pleading with me to make the pain go away. I came here with him to do just that. To find out what's going on and make the pain go away. He just told you all those awful things that he apparently did without him being aware of it and you're telling us he is making it up? That he is telling all those things and maybe even really hurting others because he wants attention?' I stand there listening with my mouth wide open. He can't be serious...

'Sir, it's very common for young people to act out like this after they were receiving a lot of attention and suddenly it's gone. They just need others way to find it.'

'There is no way he would ever do that. He hated all the attention he was getting when he was blind. He would never hurt other people to get that back. You can't accuse him of this. He needs to be tested further. You have to test him, it's your job!'

Ouch... what the.. My head.. It feels like someone is stabbing me over and over again... Slowly my vision starts to blur..

General pov

'Mr. Taylor, your son does not need a doctor. He needs a therapist. Now I can recommend someone for you, she has worked with a lot of ..' Dr. Masterson suddenly looks to the side and finds his newest patient standing there, staring at him.

'Randy, what are you doing out here?'

'Mr. Taylor, I am not finished talking to your parents yet. Please go back to the hospital room.' He starts to turn towards the parents again, when he realizes the teenager is not leaving. He just stands there staring.

'Randy?' His father tries to get his attention, but he doesn't respond. He calls out to him, but he doesn't seem to acknowledge his father.

'A therapist? You think I'm crazy?' Tim Taylor looks on in confusion as his middle son speaks in a tone he has never heard before.

'Randy, listen to me alright? You need to calm down...' he tries as he notices his son balling his fists and walking towards the doctor in a menacing way. And then, he smiles...

'A therapist. Ha, you're funny, doc.' The doctor smiles politely and starts to approach him.

'Mr. Taylor, you don't need to do this. I already explained to your parents what's going on with you. I know. You don't have to hide it anymore. Just be honest.' He says with a smile and then reaches out to touch his shoulder. Oops...

--

**A/N **Hiya! Sorry for ending it there and sorry for the not so interesting chapter. I thought I was all ready to write, but writer's block keeps setting back in. I'm going to try and get a better chapter for next time!

Anyway, I hope you still liked it somewhat and hopefully you'll read and review again. Thank you!

Love, Baxxie


	16. Chapter 15 Reassurance

Chapter 15 Reassurance

In one swift moment, Randy has the doctor on his knees with his arm around him in a choking hold. His family is in shock as they see the rage and strength in the once so sweet and innocent Randy.

Other hospital staff quickly tries to break it up, but Randy won't let go. The doctor is fighting for his life and his face is turning red from the lack of oxygen.

'What is going on here?' Another, bulkier doctor rushes into the hallway when he hears all the commotion. He shouts something to one of the orderlies and when he returns, he gives the doctor a syringe. He quickly places it in Randy's arm. After a few seconds, his grip loosens. Before either one of them lose consciousness, some orderlies pull doctor Masterson out of Randy's grasp and quickly carry him into a hospital room. They Taylors watch in silence as Randy is also carried back into his hospital room.

'What happened? Whose patient is he?' Tim slowly walks up to the new doctor and explains what has been going on.

The doctor sighs and shakes his head. 'Mr. Taylor, I would like to apologize beforehand on behalf of my colleague. My name is Dr. Grace and I will take over this patient. I can assure you I will do my best to figure out what is wrong with your son.'

As they walk into Randy's room, Tim almost cries as he sees his son now strapped to the hospital bed. 'Is that really necessary? You don't even know why he did that..'

'Until we do, I'm afraid we have no other choice. At the moment he could be a danger to himself and others. It's just a precaution.' Tim still looks worried. 'Now, I would like to perform some tests on your said he seemed in a lot of pain last time this seemingly happened?'

'Yeah, he was holding his head, screaming for the pain to stop.' The doctor nods, while looking through Randy's chart.

'Alright. Then I would like to do a CT scan just to be sure.'

'What do you think it could be, doctor?'

'I'm not sure yet Mr. Taylor. It could be many things. But we'll find out.' He gives Tim a kind smile and makes him feel a lot more at ease right away.

_Some time later..._

'But dad, it gives off radiation...'

'Randy, trust me, it won't take long and you won't give light in the dark afterwards.' Tim reassures his son, who sticks out his tongue. Tim just grins at him as his bed is wheeled beyond where he's allowed.

He goes to sit in the waiting room, where he tries to stop thinking the worst.

He'll be fine. Of course he'll be fine. It's Randy... Oh god, please let it be okay.

The family sits together in silence for what seems like hours, afraid to say the wrong thing.

When the doctor walks in, everyone looks up in fear. They stand up immediately, while trying to read the doctors face.

'Mr. and Mrs. Taylor, we successfully did the CT scan on your son, he is being wheeled back to his room. I would like to go over the results with you. In private.' He says while eyeing Brad and Mark. The family shares a look, while Tim and Jill silently follow the doctor to a more private area.

After a few seconds in silence, the doctor scrapes his throat.

'During the CT scan we found something in your sons head. A mass.'

'What does that mean?' Tim carefully asks.

'We will have to do some extra tests on your son to find out for sure. But we suspect a brain tumor.'

'Oh my god...'

'We would like to perform a biopsy on your son to find out for sure what we're dealing with and if it's malignant or not.'

The doctor goes on to explain the procedure of the biopsy and what else it might be, but Tim has stopped hearing it. His son might have a brain tumor. He might have cancer. He might die...

Some time later they are in Randy's room, supporting him while the doctor explains what's going to happen.

He seems calm throughout the whole thing, but Tim knows better. Randy is just like him. He can tell exactly what's going on with him and knows he is bottling up his feelings. He squeezes his shoulder and Randy looks at him with a small smile. Everything will be fine. Right?

--

**A/N **I'm very sorry for the long update.. I keep getting writer's block. Apparently I think better when I am busy with school. Time for my vacation to end ;)

Anyway, I hope you liked the chapter and I will try to update sooner next time!

Thank you and goodnight!

Love, Baxxie


	17. Chapter 16 The mind does wander

Chapter 16 The mind does wander

Tim

I've been to hospitals before. Okay, lots of times. And I've been scared before, but it's different this time. Being called in to a hospital because your son might have a brain tumor is very different.

They did a biopsy on Randy a few days ago to find out if it's malignant or not. Jill held his hand and it tore my heart out seeing him go through all that pain. I know it's necessary, but why can't they invent a less painful way?

Anyway, the doctor called and told us to come see him. Here Jill and I are, walking through these white halls with lead in our shoes. I don't remember the hallway being this long last time. I guess knowing you're about to receive bad news makes your mind try to put it off for as long as possible. I have to try my hardest not to turn around and run out the door, just to avoid having this conversation.

When we get to his door, I'm relieved to find him open it himself. My hands are shaking so much, I wouldn't have been able to do it myself.

As we sit down, I try not to look at his face. I don't want to see it in his eyes. But it doesn't stop him from talking.

'Mr. and Mr.s Taylor, thank you for coming. We got your son's biopsy results back. I'm afraid it is as we already feared.' Here it comes... 'Your son has a malignant brain tumor in his head. We need to have it removed immediately to prevent further damage. We were able to determine that the tumor can easily be removed, since it is not attached to any dangerous nerve endings. However, brain surgeries always have risks. It is up to you to decide whether or not we operate.'

And there it is. One of the worst decisions a parent will ever have to make. If we say no, he'll die. If we say yes, he might die anyway. But at least then, the doctors can say they tried everything. No, that's not fair. They're probably very good at what they do. But putting my son's life in their hands. Is that really something I want to risk?

'..Tim? We need to decide on what's best for him. They should do it.' I snap awake as I realize Jill is talking to me.

' Shouldn't we discuss this first? In private?'

'Honey, I'm scared, too. But we have to decide fast... our son's life is in danger. I don't want to put him nearer to death than he already is.'

I'm amazed at how easily that word came out of her mouth. Death. That in the same sentence as my son, makes me rethink and speak before my mind wanders off again.

'Do it. Save his life, please.' I am aware at how scared and sad I sound, but I just put my son's life in a strange man's hands. I don't know if I'm very comfortable with it, but I don't think I have a choice.

Walking out of the doctor's office makes me realize the worst part is yet to come. Now we have to tell Randy. Oh good news, son. You're going to be okay. They will have to open up your skull, but you'll be all better!

I'm not sure I can do it.

Thankfully Randy takes it a lot better than I thought. He just asks what will happen. As the doctor explains the procedure, I notice he's not listening at all. His mind is not with us. It's all an act. When the doctor leaves and Jill follows to ask him more questions, I stay behind and look at him again. Putting up a brave face.

'Randy?' he just looks at the sheets of his hospital bed. 'Randy?' he jumps as I touch his shoulder. I sigh heavily, seeing the fear again. I just grab him and give him a hug. He doesn't respond because of the surprise. But soon, I can feel him leaning into it and soon the sobs come with the rain of tears. I just try to soothe him.

Things couldn't have just stayed good for him, could it. He finally got his sight back, but it came with a price.

'Shh, it'll be okay. I'm right here...'

--

**A/N **Hi! Sorry for the looong wait. Here's a new chapter and I hope you like it. Sorry for all the drama, but no one said it would be a fun story :P

Anyway, please let me know what you think and thank you for the reviews!

Love, Baxxie


	18. Chapter 17 Open up your Mind

Chapter 17 Open up your Mind

Brad's POV

I can't believe this is happening right now. I thought he just lost his mind.. I yelled at him, I wanted to hurt him. And now as it turns out, he has a brain tumor? First he was blind, then he got better and now his brains will be operated on because he has a tumor.

What will happen to him? What if he comes back less smart? I mean, he is the smart one in our family.. He can't change...

I mean what would happen if Mark turned normal all of a sudden? It would ruin the family. God, I hope he'll be okay. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to either one of my brothers.. This whole thing started because I wasn't watching Randy.. If he died..

Mark's POV

Wow, Brad seems very much lost in thought.. Didn't know that was possible. Okay, I'll stop.. Of course he's upset, everyone is. Randy's head is being cut open right now..

I just hope he'll be better now and that this is the last time we have to come here.. For Randy anyway. I can't believe all the things that he did without knowing it. I can't imagine what he must be feeling. I mean, we don't know any details, but I guess we should just ask Randy when he wakes up. If he wakes up...

No, I can't think about that..

I look up as I feel someone touching my shoulder, Brad's concerned face looks at mine.

'I'm heading for a drink, you want something?'

'Yeah, but I'll come with you.' He just nods as we head away from the waiting game.

Tim and Jill's POV

It's so difficult sitting out here. Nothing to do but wait. We'd do anything to go just go in that operating room and be there for him. Hold his hand, talk to him, reassure him everything will be fine. Even if that would mean we'd have to lie.. That's what parents do. We want to protect our children at all costs. Sitting and not doing a thing, when we know they're hurt and alone, it drives any parent crazy.

We watch as our other sons quietly leave to get drinks. We faintly hear them asking us if we want anything, but it never registers. Drinks aren't on our minds right now. All we want is for a doctor to come round that corner and tell us the operation went great and we get to take our son home right away.

Of course it's never that easy...

Or is it? We watch as a doctor emerges from the forbidden zone with a grim look on his face. Oh no... We stand up as he approaches us.

'The operation on your son was successful.' Phew.. 'We got rid of most of the tumor. However, there was a small part that was deeply lodged into his brain. We felt it was too big of a risk to remove this. Your son will have to come back for check-ups so we can keep an eye on it and make sure it doesn't cause any damage.' We hold each other close. We know there is a chance it will grow back. They explained it to us before the surgery. But this could mean the chances are that much higher.

'Your son is in the recovery room right now. You can go so him in a little bit. I'll have a nurse come and get you in time.' We nod, still not ready to talk. He's alright. For now...

---------------------

**A/N **So sorry for the very long wait. I hope people out there are still interested in this story. I know it's been a while, but I just had trouble coming up with the next chapters. I hope to finish the next one soon.

If you are out there reading my story, please review :)

Thank you and Love, Baxxie


	19. Chapter 18 Of Red Doors

Chapter 18 Closing the Door

Randy's POV

It's weird. I know many people have talked about outer body experiences. I always thought they were crazy, just like the people who believe in aliens. But how else do I explain watching the doctor opening up my own skull...

I thought I'd feel sick. But I didn't really feel much of anything. And I wasn't floating in the air by the way. I was standing right next to them. Next to myself. After seeing a little too much of my own brain matter, I walked out of the operating room and into the waiting room. I just stood there for a moment, watching my parents and two brothers. they looked so sad and worried, I wanted to reach out to them. I wondered if they noticed me, sensed me if you will. I'm guessing no, as they don't believe in this stuff.

The weirdest part was, someone actually did notice me. But it wasn't my family. It was a young girl, probably ten. She had a sun dress on, curly black hair. She was standing in the hallway, just staring at me. When I started to walk towards her, she giggled and started to run. For some weird reason, I chased after her. After crossing through a couple of hallways, we reached a red door. It didn't seem like a hospital door. I wanted to follow when she went inside, but that's the moment my surgery was over. I was pulled back into my body.

The moment I woke up in my hospital bed, bandages covering my head, that girl was all I could think about. Who was she? Was she trying to tell me something? What was behind that door?

When my family visited me, I tried to respond and smiled a little. But I felt tired and the little girl made me confused. The nurse told them they better let me sleep. I needed a lot of rest after such an intense surgery. I agreed. But honestly, I was just happy I woke up at all. And even more so, I didn't lose my vision either. So, after feeling very relieved, I really did want to go to sleep. Maybe when I started dreaming, I could go back to that door. It feels so important, I can't put my finger on it.

After the last yawn, sleep came quickly. Unfortunately, that red door did not come back. My next dream is just to go home and feel normal again. Maybe I could even patch things up with Samantha and Jeremy. For now, shutting off any thoughts and just sleeping. It's nice to have control back once again...

A/N Hi there! Sorry once again, here is my latest update :) I know this chapter may seem kind of short and strange, it just popped into my head.. Hope you liked it, read and review please :)

Love and thanx,

Baxxie


	20. Chapter 19 Awakening

Chapter 19 Awakening...

Randy's POV

In my dreams I have tried to reach the red door again, but every time I go round the corner.. I'm pulled away. This time I will get there. I see the girl waiting for me again. She smiles, but doesn't run away when I reach out. She grabs my hand and giggles as she guides me to the now well known hallway.

I try to see beyond and hope that I don't get pulled away. The girl squeezes my hand tightly. As if she knows what I'm thinking. We keep going forward, when I see it. The red door. But something is different.. Wait.. It's open. But how?

The girl now let's go of my hand and runs through the opening. I walk towards it, but something keeps me from moving over the threshold. I try to steer away from ths hold on me, but it is powerful. I glance through the opening and in surprise there's another hallway. But it's so long, I can't see even see the end.. There are just a lot of doors. Different shapes, different colors, different sizes, locks..

I see the girl beckoning me to come with her. She opens a green circular door and moves through. I want to follow, but I am being pulled back again. I struggle as much as I can, but the pull is too strong.. I can't go now.. I have to go in, I need to see what's behind the other doors..

I open my eyes, still struggling against the hold.. It's my dad. He looks at me in surprise and with concern. But it wuickly changes to relief.

'Hey kiddo.' He tells me as he sits down. I look around and see my mom there as well.

'Hi honey..'

'Hey..' Wow, my voice sounds weird. I feel so tired.. Those doors..

'How do you feel?' Dad asks.

'Okay, I guess. Just tired.'

'It's good to see you awake and talking.' The doctor's voice now adds. I must have looked confused at it. 'You've been drifting in and out of consciousness for the past three days.'

'Wow.. Three days..' And I haven't even got past the threshold? This is going to take forever. I need to go back to sleep, it'll only take longer. I try to go back to sleep, but I'm stopped.

'I'm sorry, but you really need to stay awake for a moment. The nurse will take a blood sample and..'

'But the green door. It's open, I have to go in.' I tell my parents and the doctor in all honesty. They look at me like I've lost my mind.

'What green door sweetie?' My mom asks while taking a hold of my hand.

'The green door. In the hallway behind the red door. You know, doctor, the big red door with the black handles?' He exchanges a glance with my parents, who look concerned.

'This is a hospital. We don't have any red doors.'

'You don't? Are you sure? I did see it. I think. Or maybe it was a dream?' I mumble to them, but mostly to myself. It couldn't be a dream. It was so real.. It felt real. And important.

I faintly hear my parents talking to the doctor. I must have really scared them, they're talking about running tests. Maybe the operation didn't go well.. I better reassure them.. Guess the red door will need to just my secret.

'Hey dad, how was Tool Time today? Blow anything up?' I say with the biggest smirk I can muster. Dad looks at me and smiles in relief.

'No, I didn't blow anything up.' He looks at his shoes with a smile. I wait for the rest with one eyebrow higher. 'I just destroyed Al's car.'

I start to smirk again and shake my head. 'Well, it wasn't my fault. You see, I told him not to park that car on the set. Something might happen. He didn't listen. So when we started the show and I was going to show people how to bring a hot tub into your garden, when it doesn't fit through your fence opening. You remember mom's car right? before the beam landed on it?'

'Yeah..'

'Well, Al's car looked a little worse.' I chuckle and shake my head again. 'But you should see the hot tub. It has these water jets, that change color.. and they just..' I let him talk, it feels good to feel a little normal again.

But that secret deep inside will not go away. What is behind the green door? And why do I feel like I might not like it?

**A/N **Hi! Another update. Again a different side to this story, but it will make sense later. If you have questions, ask away. Not sure I'll answer though ;)

Thank you for reading and hopefully reviewing. With love from Baxxie to you :P


	21. Chapter 20 Learning to Swing

Chapter 20 Learning to Swing

Randy's POV

I've been in the hospital for a few weeks now. My head feels a lot better, but the radiation doesn't feel good. It's been horrible, having to go through it five days a week, feeling nauseous all the time.

I hate not being able to go home. Sure, my family is right here with me, but I would love to sleep in my own bed again. I do like spending time with my family. It's been weird for a while, especially with Brad and Mark. I can't blame them for not being able to act normal around me. I mean, I was a jerk to both of them.

'Hey bro.' I look up from my bed and smile a little at Brad as he walks in, shuffling his feet.

'So, how are you doing?' He asks as he sits down.

'Well, I am doing just great. I feel like crap, the food is crap, my head still hurts and I have no hair.' I immediately regret my words as he puts his head down. 'I'm sorry. I'm just kind of fed up with being here.'

He smiles a little. 'I guess this is what dad must feel like when he gets here.' He smirks.

'No, I think he's gotten used to it by now, it feels more like home than our house.' We both laugh out loud to this, when my head hurts again.

'Oh, Sorry..'

'No, Brad, don't be. I can use some laughter.'

'Do you want to here something really interesting?'

'What?'

'Mark told me he has a girlfriend.'

'No way.. Did he have to blow her up himself?' We laugh again.

I love spending time with Brad like this. Makes me feel normal again.

_Some time later..._

We talked for a while, but somewhere I guess I fell asleep. I don't remember it, but I noticed the scenery changing. The hallway is back. But instead of having to chase the girl, I am now right in front of the red door. It's open again. But now my feeling of curiosity come together with uneasiness.

My curiosity gets me and I step over the threshold. I slowly walk down the hallway and suddenly am stopped. I can't go further. I turn around and see the green door I saw last time. The moment I try to reach the handle, it opens. I hesitate, but suddenly feel like I'm being pulled in.

A flash of light makes me close my eyes. When I reopen them, I feel like I've stepped into another reality. I'm in our house. But somehow it looks different. Older.

I hear laughter coming from outside. I walk to the backdoor and want to open it. But my hands go through the door. Okay, this is creeping me out a little. The rest just finds it really cool. I now walk through the door and towards the sounds.

I see our old swing set in the yard. Mom is there, laughing together with dad as they look t something or someone and cheer.

I follow their eyes and see... myself.. a 3 year old version of myself, playing on the swing. I get higher and higher, until I can't go any further. I stop and mom and dad cheer and hug me.

Oh, right, I taught myself how to swing. Funny, but weird seeing it myself. I want to keep watching, when I hear a voice in the distance. It's the little girl. She is calling my name and sounds upset.

I hurry towards the voice and call out her name, which pops into my head.

'Lucy?' We get closer and when her voice is close enough, I see her back in the hallway. I reach for her when I see her crying face. I crouch down to her and she cries harder while looking behind me.

I look behind me and see.. nothing. The door is gone. It's like it was never there. Somehow I feel like something just happened, it doesn't feel right. But before I can keep thinking, I shoot awake.

Apparently I was loud, because I woke up Brad, who fell asleep in the chair beside me.

'What happened, are yu okay?'

'I don't know. I had a weird dream, something feels off.'

'ou want me to get a doctor?'

'No, it's just a feeling, it's not physical.'

'What was your dream about?'

'I... I don't know...'

**A/N **Hi! Hope you still like my story. If you are reading this and you like it, please review :) It keeps writers motivated and it's just a nice thing to do :)

Thank you and until the next chapter...

Love, Baxxie


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